25 signs you've grown up

Twenty-five Signs You Have Grown Up

By: Salma Rumman (View Profile)

1. Your houseplants are alive, and you can't smoke any of them.

2. Having sex in a twin bed is out of the question.

3. You keep more food than beer in the fridge.

4. 6:00 AM is when you get up, not when you go to bed.

5. You hear your favorite song in an elevator.

6. You watch the Weather Channel.

7. Your friends marry and divorce instead of "hook up" and "breakup."

8. You go from 130 days of vacation time to 14.

9. Jeans and a sweater no longer qualify as "dressed up."

10. You're the one calling the police because those %&@# kids next door won't turn down the stereo.

11. Older relatives feel comfortable telling sex jokes around you.

12. You don't know what time Taco Bell closes anymore.

13. Your car insurance goes down and your car payments go up.

14. You feed your dog "Science Diet" instead of McDonald's leftovers.

15. Sleeping on the couch makes your back hurt.

16. You take naps.

17. Dinner and a movie is the whole date instead of the beginning of one.

18. Eating a basket of chicken wings at three in the morning would severely upset, rather than settle, your stomach.

19. You go to the drug store for ibuprofen and antacid, not condoms and pregnancy tests.

20. A four dollar bottle of wine is no longer "pretty good #++%."

21. You actually eat breakfast food at breakfast time.

22. "I just can't drink the way I used to" replaces "I'm never going to drink that much again."

23. Ninety percent of the time you spend in front of a computer is for real work.

24. You drink at home to save money before going to a bar.

25. When you find out your friend is pregnant you congratulate them instead of asking "Oh #++% what the hell happened?"

Bonus:26: You read this entire list looking desperately for one sign that it doesn't apply to you and can't find one to save your sorry old !$@.

The BIG SCARY WORD!

"Here it is bam! then you say Goddam this a dope jam". An introduction from the legendary Public Enemy and their classic "Night of the living baseheads". My dorky ass thought it sounded cool or something! I digress!( THE mack lessons DOE!!) Anyway, here is a diatribe(a shameful attempt at trying to sound intelligent) of sorts from the infamous "Mr. Deep Thoughts"(This one took a minute "G").The legendary comic and writer Paul mooney once said " I say nigga 100 times every morning to keep my teeth white". I wish I was insightful enough to tell you what he meant. I'm not. Hopefully, all of you critical thinkers out there will find a way to make it relevant. Some of the most prolific, insightful, enlightning, challenging, honest, and sincere thoughts conjured up by one's mind were those that were never verbalized. How do I know this you might ask? I will tell you. Some things can't be explained. Some things should not have to be explained. A brilliant mind asked me to give my spiel on the use of the n-word. Let us not fear this word that has pervaded the American lexicon for centuries. Take a second and say Nigger! or Nigga! Use the one that makes you comfy! Now see. You did not faint, black out, seize, or go into tardive dyskinesia(Here I go agian trying to sound smart. How dare that nigga!). I wish that I could provide the world with some prophetic answer for the African-American usage of a word that causes slaves, jim crow victims, the lynched, EMMIT TILL, MLK, MEDGAR EVERS, MALCOLM X, HARRIET TUBMAN, THURGOOD MARSHALL, FREDERICK DOUGLAS, and others to do cartwheels in their final resting places. I can't. Fortunately the constitution has this deal called freedom of speech(If I were really smart I would refer to the amendment). Unfortunately, this does not prevent people from getting mollywhopped! This is a term I heard used today when someone described his response to a white guy calling him a nigger. Maybe we took the hurt and power from the word or the oppressor and deemed it a term of endearment. What's up my nigga!! I got love for my Nigga's! I am down for my nigga's! I'll put holes in a nigga for my niggas'! The truth is no one should use nigga! Nigga's should not say nigga. No geek, bookworm, brainiac, nuclear scientist, the genuises from Good Will hunting or Finding forrester could provide me with enough evidence to justify the use of the word! But guess what folks? We still use it! I still use the word! I will probably use it the next time one of my "nigga's" calls! What a vacillating hypocrite I can be! Unless you(Caucasians or any persons not defined as "niggas") have been given a special,special, special, special ghetto pass form your "niggas" don't say nigga! Remember mollywhopped!! Now that may not happen. Use at your own risk!! I will let the great poet Bruce Hornsby and his group the Range sum up for you this entire waste of time i just dispensed. "That's just the way it is. Some things will never change!' If this sounds like a disorganized, confused, or lopdisded rant remember what I said earlier. Some things just should not be explained.
COMMON SENSE(not the rap guy) tip of the day: Use COMMON SENSE!! If you can accomplish this I promise you will never, ever be perplexed by this quandary: They call themselves nigga's! Why can't we? Think nigga's, think!!

D-rock

When Hip Hop Made a Ni**@ Think

Elvis was a hero to most but he never meant s@#t to me you see straight-up racist the sucker was simple and plain. Flava flav: "Muthaf#$k him and JOHN wayne". Cause I'm black and I'm proud I'm ready I'm hyped cause I'm amped. Most of our heroes don't appear on no stamp". The legendary, iconic, and prolific Chuck D of Public Enemy- "FIGHT THE POWER", circa 1989. From the brilliant Spike Lee masterpiece "DO THE RIGHT THING".



D-rock

Gosh Damn It's HOT!

Living in Southern California, we are fortunate to have the finer things; women, cars, palm trees, Hollywood, SD, and 'weather'. Weather? I think NOT! This weekend is straight BLISTERING (102 degrees) and I haven't done a damn thing but sit in my shorts and t-shirt, all day. The AC is crankin (word to soldier boy) and I have no plans, hence the abscence of REAL photos. It's too hot to go outside and take a snap picture. According to the weather channel, the heat is suppose to persist until Tuesday. Looks like I need a one way ticket to the Northwest, where they have mild summers. Cali is becoming too much like Arizona and I'm not a zealot of it

Old Skool VIdeo of the day

Shaq O'neal - I know I got skillz.

I remember riding in my Supra that weighed 12,000 pounds bumpin this CD single. You couldn't beat them .99 cent singles from the Wherehouse.

D'angelo is coming back!

D'Angelo is working on a new album that will be released in 2009,through J Records.The R&B singer's last CD,"Voodoo," was issued in 2000 and sold 1.69 million copies in the United States.According to reports,D'Angelo plans on collaborating with Raphael Saadiq and John Mayer,on the project.
A single might even see the light before the end of 2008.

Hopefully this N' won't come (no homo) with a half, my bad, naked video again. But really, I'm light weight hating. Good to see the brotha is making music again.

SELF- Efficacy

Do you ever say to yourself , "some folks try too damn hard"? the funny thing about us homosapiens( just wanted to sound smart!) is that often we don't realize just how transparent we are. Do you ever wonder if people who are really jerks know that they are jerks? Consider for a moment that one Boss that almost sent you to prison for life!! You get my drift! Would Adolf Hitler define himself as a murdering white supremacist? Does Sirhan Sirhan truly think of himself as an assassin? Does that bastard Timothy Mcveigh consider himself a terrorist? Does George Bush think to himself " My eight years as Commander in Chief have really sucked"? I am sure they all would answer "No". When we justify or rationalize our faults it can be very difficult for us to see our true selves. I can relate because i have been guilty of the same s#$t! Self exploration can be a tough road to travel. I know because life has forced me to do it everyday. this is just some of the goofy s%$t I think of when I'm bored.
Besides, what the hell do i know anyway?

BE EASY

D-ROCK